Dementia patient’s daughter: It’s breaking my heart that I can’t help mum

Janice Cochrane, whose 86-year-old mother Mary has dementia and is in a care home, was diagnosed with Covid-19 in March. She has now tested negative, but remains in isolation in the home where some residents have died from the virus.

Janice, 55, said: “I’ve tried to stay in touch with mum via Skype but during the video calls she doesn’t speak. She just doesn’t know what’s going on.

“She has been in a room on her own for 24 hours a day for seven weeks now, and it’s been almost 10 weeks since I’ve seen her in person.

“I used to spend hours with her. She’s being kept in a room on her own, I completely understand the risk, but you wouldn’t leave a child or someone disabled on their own like this.

“I cry when I come off the phone to her – it’s breaking my heart that I can’t help her.

‘‘I’ve never been away from my mum this long in my life. The nursing home staff are doing everything they can. It’s not the fault of the nursing home, it’s a failure of public health.’’

Janice added: “Everyone with dementia is different, so we can’t have blanket decisions as individuals have their own particular needs.

‘‘Everyone is at different stages, it has affected the brain in different ways, so how they react to something will not be the same as the person sitting beside them.’’

There are an estimated 20,000 people living with dementia in Northern Ireland. However, the condition, already the UK’s biggest killer, has been even more deadly during the current pandemic – claiming more lives and leaving many feeling fearful and vulnerable.

A survey by the Alzheimer’s Society has revealed people affected by dementia in Northern Ireland are experiencing severe loneliness and are struggling to cope during lockdown.

The charity is helping to alleviate the anxiety many face by making almost 3,000 ‘welfare calls’ to reach out to those in need.

Bernadine McCrory, country director for Alzheimer’s Society in Northern Ireland, said: “Coronavirus has turned life upside down for the thousands of people affected by dementia; many are scared, lonely and struggling to get the help they desperately need.”

The Alzheimer’s Society’s funds have been badly hit by the pandemic, meaning it now faces a potential drop of £45 million in income and has launched an emergency appeal.

• Donations to Alzheimer’s Society’s Emergency Appeal can be made at alzheimers.org.uk/coronavirus-appeal